Uncaging Nicolas is the ultimate Nicolas Cage tabletop role playing game!

I’ll admit it. I’m not a table-top roleplaying game expert. I know of Dungeons and Dragons and Warhammer and a few other tabletop adventures, and I know that creative individuals can whip up a tabletop game with some simple rules and lots of ingenuity.

Enter Jes The Human. Jes has created their own tabletop role playing game – essentially their game involves every iteration of Nicolas Cage’s acting career – everything from movies to television to videogames. Thus begat the game Uncaging Nicolas, which debuts today on Jes The Human’s website.

So … what are the rules of Uncaging Nicolas?

According to GamesHub, “You and your friends will embody a variety of Nicolas Cages from across the ‘Nic Cage Multiverse’ – a realm populated by every character played by Nicolas Cage in the world of cinema and beyond. Your role, as an individual Nicolas Cage, is to find a ‘prime’ Nicolas Cage lost somewhere in the multiverse, and figure out which movie he belongs to in order to send him back. You and your squad of Nic Cages have been hired to uncage him, figure out what movie he belongs in, and send his ass back there. The rules are less inspired by other TTRPG systems and more by Nic Cage quotes from his life and movies he’s starred in.”

That’s right. It’s the tabletop version of The Unbearable Lightness of Being if it was soldered to a copy of Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse, with a dash of Everything Everywhere All At Once.

You need a fast driver? Choose from Nicolas Cage in Gone in 60 Seconds. Maybe someone who is good at hand-to-hand combat and disguise? I hear Nicolas Cage in Face/Off would fit here.

Or maybe you need someone with the ability to throw cursed fire at their adversaries? Heck, Nicolas Cage played Ghost Rider in two different movies. Or if you want to expand on his superhero abilities, you could pull in his Spider-Man Noir from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, or that Superman test shot from Superman Lives, or as Hit Girl’s dad in Kick-Ass.

Do you think you’ll need to deal with the undead? Choose your Nicolas Cage carefully. Perhaps as Renfield the vampire hunter, or as the title character of Vampire’s Kiss.

How about a surreal Nicolas Cage? Something along the lines of Wild at Heart or Pig or Birdy?

You might need a problem-solving Nicolas Cage, which would work in your favor depending on which edition of National Treasure you choose.

Nicolas Cage as your pilot? Sure. Just remember, you’re either going to have a cargo plane full of flying Elvises (Con Air), or half your passengers are going to disappear in mid-flight (Left Behind), so take your pick.

I can understand this. This could be a fun party game, and a decent deviation from the tabletop stereotype of “roll the dice to see if I’m getting drunk” schtick.

And for all the Nicolas Cages out there in their various Nicolas Cage iterations … I might be interested in playing this game for a coppola minutes.

Yeah, you saw what I did there, didn’t you? 😀